Broken Reality

So it’s that time of year again where i fuck off to the glorious west country (all roight moi luvur?!) to get drunk in a field and enjoy some fantastic musics!

Of course i’m talking about Glastonbury and i’m totally excited to get going tomorrow for the giant party experience. Especially since i’m not living in a tent the size of a small postage stamp this year, luxury was my aim for my drunken field sleeping!

The line up looks brilliant too, some bands i’ve want to see (again) for quite a while now! Really looking forward to some of the acts this year.

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Ok, so i watched a few more of the larger E3 pressers and have had my brain filled with gaming based goodness - and badness - coming in the next 12-18 months. Here’s how i reacted to the rest of the conferencess i watched in the format of the Fail Scale.

I’ve also added elements from the Microsoft Conference, even re-evaluating some with a little bit more of a mature outlook.

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Rather than do a write up, i tweeted my initial reactions to the M$ Conference this year. It makes no sense but i don’t care. You can find my ramblings at http://twitter.com/MrCarrick as ususal.

However i did quite enjoy some of the mentions. I loved the original Crackdown and so a return to this franchise is much welcomed but i will have to see how much love i will send their way when more is revealed. The game now looks a lot less cell shaded, more gritty and well has zombies and monsters in it.

Like everything else.

Speaking of Zombies a return to another much loved game and the IP of the year for me from 2008 - Left 4 Dead.

The second installment sees 4 new survivors, 5 new campaigns, new special zombies along with alterations to the ones we know and love (to kill); such as Wandering Witches. It seems not all emos hide from the sun as the Witch likes to wander about when it’s day light rather than sit and cut herself.

There’re two doses of Halo loving for me in the next 18 months with both Halo ODST AND Halo Reach a previously hidden project buried deep in the earth’s crust whom no one could gaze upon untill today.

Both look awesome.

Now what else… let’s head toward the (and i will say personal oppinion, i appreciate some people like these games*) fail scale.

LEGO Harry Potter Years 1-4. Fail.

Forza 3. Treacle Fail.

Cliffy B. Life Fail.

Tom Clancy Presents: Tom Clancy’s: Tom Clancy’s: Splinter Cell: Conviction by Tom Clancy, Presented by Tom Clancy. Tom Clancy Fail.

Metal Gear Solid. Sony Fail.

Natal Man Borking his Avatar. Windows 98 BSOD Fail.

And for the Win…

Natal (if it works). Win.

Metal Gear Solid. Xbox Win.

Sky, Last.fm & Zune. Win.

Arkham Asylum. Sexy Lady Win.

Beatles Cock Up. Fail Win.

Alan Wakes Existance. Not Duke Nukem Win.

Appart from those slanted views toward the 360 conference, there was something called Modern Warfare 2 as well. Who knew Infinity Ward made games eh?

Oh, Chuck Norris can do all of the push ups, in answer to your question Microsoft.

*Except Splinter Cell. That IS Fail.

EDIT: Just found this. Nice.

Safe Hot Fiery Death - Coming to a Power Plant Near You?

The very clever people of the word are at it again, hoping to answer more questions such as can we use fusion as clean energy, what’s the real deal with stars themselves and again for planetary systems; least* importantly of course it’s to have a whopping great nuclear deterrent on America’s door step.

To me it sounds very interesting, as I always enjoy a bit of big science.

Now to wait for people to start screaming the end of the world by us being sucked into a homemade black hole, splitting the planet in two or baking ourselves to mush.

Read what I’m on about, here.

Just a short one today as I’m ill and in pain.

*Most, obviously - we know your game, America.

Ho Ho!  Get me and my wit.

The bad ass to the left is of course none other than Mr Duke Nukem, serial womaniser, defender of whoever, fan of the titties and… well a bad ass.

Although i’ve never played a Duke Nukem game i’m aware of their success and the love they get from my fellow geek, but it now looks like his ‘latest’ title will never see the light of day.

3DRealms the guys behind the latest game in the Duke Universe seem to have finally ran out of money and i’ve gotta say i’m not suprised as it’s already taken them twelve fucking years.

Twelve years?!

I’ve often joked about Forever with mates - as i’m sure a lot of the gaming community has gone - and how it’s been in many a companies ‘Coming Soon’ list for aeons with it’s ever present TBC date. Now however it looks like it really will never come since it’s taken Forever *snigger* to develop.

Goodbye 3DRealms, let’s hope that in your honour retailers everywhere won’t notice that Duke Nukem Forever is still in those release lists.