E3:2009 - Fail Scale.

e3Ok, so i watched a few more of the larger E3 pressers and have had my brain filled with gaming based goodness - and badness - coming in the next 12-18 months. Here’s how i reacted to the rest of the conferencess i watched in the format of the Fail Scale.

I’ve also added elements from the Microsoft Conference, even re-evaluating some with a little bit more of a mature outlook.

Epic Win

  • Metroid: Other M (Nintendo/Team Ninja) - Team Ninja are pretty good behind the wheel of development, nice to see the gameplay style refreshed.
  • Doesn’t Give a Fuck Translator (Sony) - Such a stella performance, i wonder if he managed to finish his sudoku. I was giggling away to myself as i watched his live scribbling.
  • Final Fantasy VII PSP (Sony) - So many people will lose so much of their lives again. It’s almost tempting to pick up a PSP to re-live this one.
  • Project Natal (Microsoft) - If this works it will really change the face of gaming. If it works. Reaction from the gaming press seem pretty positive and the live tech demos were great viewing too. Seems pretty accurate but i can see it falling short of 1:1 accuracy for some things.
  • Motion Control (Sony) - Although still tied to an element of hardware in the hand this is what Nintendo should have had in terms of accuracy when the Wii launched. Very impressed on seeing this due to the rendering of objects in the hand of the player via the EyeToy and the extra functionality the 1:1 accuracy brings.
  • Metal Gear Solid Rising (Microsoft) - A big win for my current console’s creator, they have their fingers in many pies.
  • Halo ODST (Bungie/Microsoft) - I’m a huge Halo Nerd. I can’t help it. Looks like it will be fantastic.
  • Halo: Reach (Bungie/Microsoft) - See Above.
  • Left 4 Dead 2 (Valve) - The first game was awesome, a real action game that had me on the edge of my seat. More of the same in this case is something i will certainly be buying.
  • The Sabatour (EA) - This game looks awesome. I read a long preview about it not long ago and it got me looking forward it. Will to Fight. Cool. Disguises. Cool. Strip clubs. Awesome.
  • Brutal Legend (EA) - Looks entertaining, funny and seems to be packed with quotable one liners. Hence it gets an Epic Win.
  • Star Wars: Old Republic (EA/BioWare) - A return to KOTOR victory for BioWare, i hope the excellence of the single player games spills directly into the MMO. Certainly looks impressive thus far.
  • ModNation Racing (Sony) - This game looks awesome. This and LittleBigPlanet almost justify owning a PS3.

Win

  • Mario Galaxy 2 (Nintendo) - Would have prefered a traditional world/setting
  • New Super Mario Bros. Wii (Nintendo) - Good Game, Good Fun.
  • The Conduit (Sega) - Looks pretty good for a Wii action game, well done Sega on managing some new IP
  • Avatar (Ubisoft) - Looks pretty, sounds nuts.
  • Assassin’s Creed II (Ubisoft) - I got bored of the first one, perhaps didn’t give it enough of a chance. New elements in the sequel combined with a much more rich setting gain this a Win.
  • Information Security (Sony) - Light hearted about recent Sony leaks, i appreciate this.
  • Uncharted II (Sony/Naughty Dog) - The first game looked pretty cool, this one does aswell although in the live demo Drake seemed to take approximately a quarter of a million bullets. This has jumped into Win due to the delivery of this line: “Do you have a plan to go with that grenade?!” Shame about the Gears of War cover system.
  • PSP Go (Sony) - Those who know me, may be suprised by this grading. I’m not sure how this will sell but it’s an attractive bit of kit, plus i have to pass kudos for pushing digital distribution in such an aggressive manner. Just hope Retail has a part to play outside of hardware sales. Nice to see Sony trying to revive the PSP too.
  • Agent (Sony/Rockstar) - Sounds pretty good, too little info currently.
  • Xbox Dashboard Update (Microsoft) - Sky TV, Last.fm, Zune Video and On-Demand Gaming, thank you very much. Not sure how much i’ll use them but a great update regardless.
  • Alan Wake (Microsoft) - This looks crap-your-pants-and-not-sleep-while-sober scary. Nice to actually see the game. Well done, you’re not Duke Nukem Forever.
  • Crackdown (Microsoft/?) - The first Crackdown was brilliant, such a refreshing way to play an action game and linking in some suprisingly ‘platform’ feelings. I hope the second hasn’t been wrecked with it’s apparant grittier look and inclusion of monsters. Shame it’s changed hands development wise too.
  • Madden (EA Sports) - Never played one. Never intend to. Only reason this gets a Win is due to the hilarious video showed during the segment.

Meh

  • Wii Motion Plus (Nintendo) - Announced last year, should have been at this level at launch.
  • Wii Fit Plus (Nintendo)
  • Shaun White Snowboarding (Nintendo/Ubi) - No one cares.
  • Red Steel 2 (Nintendo/Ubisoft) - Like its requirement, the original should have performed in this manner.
  • Splinter Cell: Conviction (Ubisoft) - Lack of love for Tom Clany aside, some of the story telling elements and environmental vehicles for narration look really cool in this. If this was a new espionage IP it would be up a level.
  • PlayStation 2 (Sony) - It continues to exist, i long for it to move on with the Xbox Original. Although there are still an impressive 100 new titles due this year, however i’m sure we’ve not seen that many in the last two.
  • MAG (Sony) - ‘Massive Action Game’ although technically impressive, in the imperfect world of real internet connections, this will be quickly renamed LAG. It was very, very modern though and sadly by that i mean equiped with a wide colour palette of brown and well, grey. Just brown and grey.
  • Gran Turismo PSP (Sony) - Looks really good for a PSP game. Far too long in development though.
  • MGS PSP (Sony) - I’m not a fan of the series, sorry.
  • Beatles Rockband (Harmonix) - Not a music game fan. Not a Beatles fan. I did enjoy the slight cock up in the live performance. Intro video was schweet.
  • Modern Warfare 2 (Infinity Ward) - Meh? Never a huge fan.
  • Dragon Age (EA) - I forget what this was.
  • Mass Effect 2 (EA/BioWare) - The first one bored me. It was certainly no KOTOR.
  • MMA & Fight Night (EA Sports) - Fighting games. Meh.
  • Grand Slam Tennis (EA Sports)

Fail

  • Resident Evil (Nintendo/Capcom) - Not a Resi fan, so this gets a Fail, would have been Epic Fail but looks to be a new story atleast.
  • Dead Space Wii (Nintendo/EA) - Meh. I am not a fan of WiiMakes.
  • Rabbids Go Home (Ubisoft) - Can we please have a Rayman Platformer? Please?!
  • Your Shape (Ubisoft) - Another Wii Fit clone but with Not-Project-Natal.
  • TMNT (Ubisoft) - I fail to recall why this is in this category.
  • Gran Turismo 5 (Sony) - Looks nice but the competition have taken this market from you i feel.
  • Forza Motorsport 3 (Microsoft) - I think with the power of Xbox Live behind it, this will be a better gaming experience than GT5. I just don’t like racing simulators, they feel like i’m racing treacle.

Epic Fail

  • DSi Facebook Photo Uploads (Nintendo) - It’s a POINT THREE megapixel camera, good enough for the platform, pathetic outside of that realm.
  • Vitality Sensor (Nintendo) - Seems to be something that is going to be aggressivly shoe-horned into the system, little point to it and very little explaination at where this product might - if it does at all - go.
  • U Play (Ubisoft) - Damn it Ubisoft. We don’t need another community platform, the console divide is enough, we need to unite the gaming populace nevermind start implementing per-publisher ‘dashboards’.
  • Imagine Series (Ubisoft) - Please, leave this stuff for the show floor and low key annoucements. Yes it’s making you a considerable amount of money but the geeks want action. Not Hamsters, Hair and Fashion. Fashionable Permed Hamsters. There you go, a new game from Ubisoft this Holiday Season.
  • Being Late (Sony) - tut tut Sony, 10 minutes late!
  • Metal Gear Solid Rising (Sony) - This Fails for Sony as much as it Wins for Microsoft.
  • Need For Speed (EA) - Not a racing ’sim’ but not exactly the best racer in the world. Plus we really don’t need three versions, especially when the studio didn’t manage to get the PS3/X360 version last year to even work at release.

So many games, so much news and this is just the tip of the iceberg when it comes E3 2009. I’ve been swamped with news and have taken most of it in. One thing i can certainly say about the coming gaming year:

I’m really looking forward to it.

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One Response to “E3:2009 - Fail Scale.”

  1. E3:2009 - Fail Scale. | TechnoSwarm.com Says:

    [...] with gaming based goodness - and badness  - coming in the next 12-18 months. Read more:  E3:2009 - Fail Scale. Share and [...]

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